like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
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