it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
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