Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
Randomize