Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
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