dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
MIDGETS
????
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
