i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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