the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Randomize
