girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Randomize
