sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
Randomize
