so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Randomize
