The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
