Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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