Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize