He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
