**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
