uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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