How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize
