Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize
