The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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