I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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