ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
