you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
and i looked up. we had an audience...
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
I think a kid would responsible me up
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
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