Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
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