I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
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