I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
either way he was missing a nipple.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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