do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
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