i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
