Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Randomize
