8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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