it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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