Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
