??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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