she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
