Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
