I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
our cab driver is having phone sex.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
