i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
