Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Randomize