I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize