I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
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