I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
