Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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