just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Randomize
