Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
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suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
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We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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