What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Randomize
