So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Randomize
