suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Green mimosas i think yes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
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