I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
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Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
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I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
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