He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
