my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize