i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
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