I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
